I got a new beat that I am longing to wrap my mind around. The rhymes are right there, waiting to be written, but my feet are tired from more than 8 hours of standing. I’ve sweat as if I went to Bikram yoga and my eyes are a little glossy. What’s a girl to do? It is time to move—literally. Although my most recent shift is literally 4 doors down the hall from where I currently live, I am deep breathing as if the move involved a ride down I-95. My world was filled with sameness for five years straight. I moved into this apartment in June of 2005. After a 5 week stint as a stow-away in the basement of a lovely Jamaican family’s contractor business, I finally found my new home. The ancestors sent forth a grandfather and a father figure to make sure that I not only felt safe, but I really was protected. I redefined my whole relationship to city life and developed an immense appreciation for Brooklyn. How quickly the years go by?
Those were pretty challenging times for me emotionally. My father died September of 2005 and life seemed to flow downhill on a pretty steady schedule. For at least a year, I received monthly obituary calls. Each month I heard news of someone transitioning and although I tried to imagine friends from other countries who are much more familiar with death than I, it just didn’t seem to help my disposition. I’ve grown tremendously. I healed physically, emotionally and spiritually and even though I have lots of work yet to do, I have much to celebrate and to appreciate. As I look around my old apartment, it still appears to be filled with clutter even though I spent much of the day sorting, tossing, packing and moving. Well, I have to admit that friends came on an unplanned schedule of complementary shifts throughout the day so it wasn’t all me. The important thing is I can exhale.
I don’t know where I am going next, but the move feels short term. I am open. DC is my other home. Last summer I worked in the district. No matter where I am living or spending time I know I am looking forward to new ‘sameness’, to establishing a new foundation and to having stability and focus in my life. But first we gotta’ purge a little bit more….back to the bags and boxes.