Category Archives: Women

Letting Friends Go: Acceptance

I have a friend who uninterested in my email updates and most of my good news insisted we talk. I had not talked to her in a very long time because she is in a different country and timezone and it was hard to connect, but once the call began I remembered the real reason why we hadn’t spoken. She brushes off much of my good news with “a yeah, yeah, yeah but you have an exciting life and there’s always a new adventure on Planet Toni”.

As I’ve deepened my spiritual relationship with myself I’ve become much more sensitive and attuned to the behaviors, feelings, attitudes and intentions of others. Sometimes I hate it but when I am grounded, I can read energy like an old medicine woman living on the mountaintop. I am still bouncing in and out of that space and some days the only ground underneath my feet feels 4 feet away. Like a kid in a candy store, my life still makes me high as a kite way too often. I have, however, healed enough to know what love feels like, and in the context of love, the people you have relationships with –support, encourage, honor, celebrate and accept you.  They don’t judge, play mental games or put you down and they definitely don’t brush away your joy like it’s lint on clothing.

DSC02067

Now, sometimes a friend can significantly reduce their interaction with you but then one day you wake up and realize it was something you were secretly desiring anyway. Instead of feeling bad about it, move towards acceptance.  As I move closer to acceptance of what is and learn to accept people for where they are on their journeys instead of me trying to convince them to be somewhere else, life becomes easier.  Sometimes their absence is simply a gift of abundance—more time and more room for me to focus on myself and my own healing. I am well and getting better everyday.

I am at peace this morning as I release those friendships that are no longer in my best interest. I am at peace with those relationships that need space and in acceptance that we may reconnect again later in life. I am at peace with those I need to love from afar. I am meditating on compassion this morning for we never really know why people behave the way they do. We humans can be really good at stuffing emotions and hiding our suffering.  People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. I am at peace with whatever is to be. It is what it is. And so it is. Ase.

224534_2082550895637_6582228_n

 

Advertisements

One of the reasons why I Rhyme like a Girl….

A repost from Facebook that moved me so much I needed to share it again.  It helps to articulate one of the reasons I’m so committed to the work with the cipher, with Freestyle Union & why Rhyme like a Girl is on the top of my agenda:

“Hip-Hop is not a counterculture. Hip-hop is a reflection of American culture.
Though we may have rebelled to some degree to create our art form, the way we think about our community is really no different from the country we were birthed in. In fact, it is just a microcosm, a reiteration. We cannot say that we are creating real change and a paradigm shift if we do not think differently with rega

rds to patriarchy, misogyny, classism, racism, and all the other sundry of societal ills that must be addressed and worked on consistently.How many times have I been told I am a good dancer (for a girl)?

How many times have men told me passive aggressively OR directly to shut up but once men say the same thing they listen?

How many times have I been called out into the cipher with children AFTER the men dance?

How many times have women stood to the side during lectures, ciphers, and not side by side with the men as equal contributors and participants?

Hip-hop could be so beautifully revolutionary but it’s not because we don’t think and act any different than the oppressive forces that pushed us to either create the art form or to be a part of the community?

Let’s practice and create Hip-Hop the way it was intended: to go against the status quo and create new ways of living in this world.” –Yvonne H. Chow